There was once i really think that true love don't exist in this world anymore, but i was wrong. Back then i was just 14, i rmb every night which lasted for at least 5 days i cry myself to sleep. The minute i came to school, i saw him and I just couldn't control my emotions and started crying non-stop. Come to think about it, i was very stupid and immature back then. Do i even know what's love? Or do both party even love each other? The days where i suffered from all the bullshits and heartbreaks, that emotions and feelings, is something that i would never wanna experience again. Being cold to someone is just a way for me to protect myself, to not let anyone hurt me again.
You're the only person that made me feel like as though im really in love. (even thought we're not tgt) By saying that, i mean we did so much more things than what normal best friends do. I think we can compare ourselves with that sweet couple at plaza sing. ytd alrdy. LOLLLLLL
Okay, but i really mean it. Everywhere i go, simplest things like taking bus and walking home, it reminds me of you.
'Sometimes the only logical thing to do when someone you love hurts you, is to disconnect, eject, and proceed' Easier said than done. I always tell myself not to give in so easily, because people can just take me for granted.
I brought this upon myself. I deserve it. Serves me right and I've got no rights to be jealous at all. All this shit is happening because of my stubbornness. I always do this kind of stupid things and regret it only after shit happens. Promising myself that I won't do that kind of stupid shit again but I'll just keep doing it again and again. Fuck myself. I will never learn my lesson. I have to keep in mind that not everyone will be there for me whenever i need them, not everyone can tolerate all my nonsense and bullshits.
'Sometimes the only logical thing to do when someone you love hurts you, is to disconnect, eject, and proceed' Easier said than done. I always tell myself not to give in so easily, because people can just take me for granted.
I really don't know how to express my deepest thoughts and feelings. Especially towards someone I like. I always say things, and end it with a 'ah nvm' Because I'm not sure if what I want to say is right, or whether what I say can cause someone to misinterpret. I'm not good at words and that causes people to think that I'm cold. Not because I have no feelings but I really can't find the right words to express how I really feel sometimes. I'm afraid that people will judge what I say, or think that I'm attention seeking and irritating and disgusting by being mushy and all.
I brought this upon myself. I deserve it. Serves me right and I've got no rights to be jealous at all. All this shit is happening because of my stubbornness. I always do this kind of stupid things and regret it only after shit happens. Promising myself that I won't do that kind of stupid shit again but I'll just keep doing it again and again. Fuck myself. I will never learn my lesson. I have to keep in mind that not everyone will be there for me whenever i need them, not everyone can tolerate all my nonsense and bullshits.
Come to think of it, who would like it if someone treats you coldly, Who would like it if you said and do all the sweet little things for that someone and all he/she did was to take it for granted and give you those emotionless reply? Definitely i won't like it either.
I deserve to suffer from all this. telling myself again and again that i've got no rights to feel angry or jealous. Swallow all the negative feelings down and i'll be okay.
